I don’t like coffee. For one, caffeine upsets my stomach, but more importantly, I just don’t like the taste. Or the smell.
I did not let that stop me from going into the Market House on Main Street, which you will find right next to the fruit cart. What does coffee and Market House have to do with each other? Well, the Market House sells coffee.
Here's a weird angle
It also claims to serve candy (yes) and preserves (no). Like the rest of the stores on Main Street, there are some fun details if you look up.
Except that I can't read any of the windows. Sorry.
The Market House is actually on a little corner leading to the lockers, dentist office, and surprise ice cream window.
On the corner
I didn't see any canned fruits and vegetables inside either.
There definitely is coffee though. Over in a corner there’s an apparatus I can only assume was an old coffee mill.
On a side note, every time I hear about an old coffee grinder, I think of the Little House On the Prairie book The Long Winter when there’s like 25 blizzards in a row and they’re all starving to death and twisting straw into log-things for the fire, and then Pa finds a secret stash of wheat and they grind it up in their little coffee grinder. And then they sat around snowed in and starving for 7 months (true fact! actually happened!) reading a couple of magazines. Such fortitude!
Also, that has nothing to do with Disneyland. Clearly.
There is a coffee bar where you can get coffee and other hot beverages
"Yes, I'd like a cup of coffee and one of those squirt bottles with a fan to go, please"
The coffee bar doesn’t get a lot of love in the summer, so they add a few things to make it more appealing, like sunscreen and the aforementioned squirt bottle.
Can’t decide what to drink your coffee at home out of? Fear not! The Market House has a wide selection of coffee-appropriate drinking vessels.
There are a lot more of these too
There’s a quaint potbelly-ish stove in the middle, and to top off the oldey timey effects, you can sit and play a round of checkers.
Or you can save yourself a hundred bucks and play checkers at home
All that’s missing is the cracker barrel. Which they could actually fill with Mickey-shaped Saltines and probably make some money that way.
Other oldey timey effects include cute little things atop the merchandise fixtures.
Just like Ma and Pa Ingalls had!
There are also fake bins that make it looks like they sell different, um, different things you find in bins.
No Mickey crackers though
Those fixtures also hold most of the candy for sale, as you can see in the above pic. There’s some generic Disney candy around with a few specialty items, including this alarming display.
Yes, over on the right that’s Tinkerbell with satanic red eyes just dying to shoot you some laser beams, or maybe those red light pointers you use to drive cats crazy, but that pales in comparison to what’s on the left.
“Who needs a conscience when you’ve got chocolate covered peanuts and a loooooooong wooden…nose?”
Oh my word.
**fans self with the squirt bottle I bought at the coffee counter in the beginning of this post**